RIP, Minority Report…maybe. Last night, Fox aired the season finale of the future-set drama. Like most new series, Minority Report has yet to be canceled, but it seems likely that ‘Everybody Runs’ will be the final episode. If the series doesn’t get resurrected, at least the show went out on a high note in one of the best episodes yet – an episode that gave us more of Wally the Caretaker. #TeamWally4eva
Seventeen years ago, Wally was recruited by the Pre-Crime program. Despite being a bit of an arrogant hacker-type, he empathized with the precogs and did his best to make them feel comfortable with the technology. The problem was, every time the precogs came out of the milkbath, they missed a murder. That means Pre-Crime wanted to keep them in the milkbath much longer than the maximum of 36 hours they’d reached. Sixty years was the goal, and Wally was deeply conflicted about lying to the precogs and taking away their lives (without their consent) no matter how other lives many it could save.
Today, though, Blomfeld isn’t so worried about consent or what ends justify the means. He’s got some DNA-based predictive facial reconstructions from evidence on Fiddler’s Neck. The three precogs aren’t identifiable (yet), but Vega certainly is.
She’s interrogating Nameless (Christopher Heyerdahl) with Agent Shale, but Nameless is remaining totally zen to trip up the biometrics of the whole-room lie detector. Andromeda shows up and stares weirdly. I cannot even with her. Anywho, Dash chases after her as the Feds are arriving to take over the investigation of Nameless and Memento Mori. There’s been a warning to Congress to nix the vote on Steven’s Law, but being Congress, this means they are even more likely to pass it. Also, in 2065, agencies are still fighting over space on the playground. Vega gets shut out of interrogating Nameless, but does manage to point out that he gave himself up too easily.
Vega heads after Dash/Andromeda, which means showing up at Arthur’s to tell them all that they need to friggin’ leave town. Dash notes that Blomfeld didn’t have back-up or a warrant when he went to Wally’s home, so he’s probably operating without DIA backing. Just as everyone is about to get into a big screaming match about what to do, Arthur and Agatha have a vision of a bunch of people struggling to breathe as their skin rapidly discolors in the same manner as the Senator’s last week. Arthur spouts off a few names (Melendez, Gianelli, Santos) and the number 99.
Dash, though, saw a park and a swing. He believes this is a Minority Report – when one precog sees something other than the rest.
Vega rushes off to the precinct to ask Nameless the significance of 99. He is non-responsive, but does give a rather interesting lecture about how viruses work. Frankly, I enjoy his particular brand of crazy. When he’s done with the lesson, he cracks a false tooth containing some sort of anesthetic and is quickly rushed to a medical facility.
Blomfeld shows up to bug Vega about why she was on Fiddler’s Neck investigating a tobacco ring when she’s a city homicide cop. Vega doesn’t have a good answer, and she’s even more flummoxed when Blake allows Blomfeld to run the three precog faces through the PD’s facial recognition. (looks like Blomfeld didn’t use the DIA system because he’s trying to hide his operation.) Blake, somewhat surprisingly, has tipped off Akeela so that she can wipe them from the database before Blomfeld runs his search. Still, it is seriously time to get outta dodge.
Over at Arthur’s, Andromeda continues lurking creepily. At least Akeela points out how weird this is. Thank you, Akeela. Dash suggests going to Wally’s, but he’s being watched so it’s too dangerous. Dash and Vega have a nice goodbye moment before she leaves the trio of precogs in Akeela’s hands so she can put some minimal football black on their faces to fool the eyedents. And of course, Dash sneaks out. Arthur says what we’re all thinking: Dash is an idiot.
Dash, being the genius that he is, shows up at Wally’s to see if the machine can get anything else out of his minority report. Wally, for his part, is pretty upset that Dash did something so stupid and dangerous, but he’s still gonna help because Wally’s a good guy. The machine is still just showing the park in Dash’s vision, which suggests that there is a different path the future might take.
Over in another brain-imaging machine, Nameless seems to be dreaming of water during his little nap, which means the target is the city’s water supply. Someone watched Batman Begins. Vega still thinks this whole thing with Nameless is strange. He wants to save humanity, not kill it, so she believes those images are planted in order to draw the police away from the real target. She starts spouting off names from Arthur’s vision, which Akeela finally looks into and discovers in a matter of seconds are staffers at Congress. I honestly thought we knew that Congress was the target already. Wasn’t there a friggin’ warning? Did no one pay attention to that? We’ve wasted 20 minutes.
Back at Wally’s, Blomfeld shows up. Of course. The twist is, so does Andromeda! She and her goon take down Blomfeld and his goon, then the whole crew arrives with stupid face makeup. The trio make Blomfeld an offer: they will voluntarily enter the milkbath if he keeps it totally off the record. He says yes. No one trusts him.
Oh joy! The police have gathered all of the suspected targets in a single bunker. This should end well.
At the warehouse with the new milkbath, Arthur hesitates to let Wally plug in the tube feeding the mind-numbing drugs, but he and the others eventually do it. Once sedated, the machine turns on and we see the vision again. This time, the park has a name: Stackhouse Park. It happens to be right next to the Senate office building, and Vega suspects the secret bunker is in fact under the park. For some reason, Akeela’s clearance prevents her from finding the real location. Have you forgotten that you can hack things? How do you think Memento Mori got the location? Jeez people!
Blake and Vega head to the park and find the TOTALLY OBVIOUS bunker entrance. They encounter two science-y people that seem to be planning to use the AC system to deliver the contagion. One shoots at Blake, but Blake and Vega blast them to hell. The contagion gets on one and she quickly dies a horrible death. With the area secure (ish), Vega tells Wally to get the precogs out of the milkbath and to safety.
Thing is, they have another vision right then of Andromeda getting killed. And yup, a sniper takes her out while Blomfeld’s goons take out Andromeda’s goon.
Turns out, Blomfeld ain’t in it for the safety of humanity. He’s all about the Benjamins. He’s selling them to Therin Tippet. As Blomfeld gets close to Arthur to say “we need to up the dosage for their long trip,” Arthur wakes up and almost drowns Blomfeld. Agatha and Dash jam the two goons with the mind-numbing sedative and stop Arthur from killing Blomfeld. Seems Arthur really loved Andromeda and he’s crushed that Blomfeld killed her.
Vega arrives to learn that the precogs have been sold to a third party, which prompts her to finally say the “put them in” line from the vision. Only, it isn’t about the precogs; it’s about Blomfeld and his goons. A high dose of sedative will keep them under for 2-3 days, and they’ll have mild amnesia. That doesn’t allay concerns that Blomfeld will be able to ID Vega and the precogs, but Vega says she can take the heat. If the trio run right now, she won’t be able tell anyone where they are because she won’t know.
As they leave, Dash’s vision warning bracelet goes off. Arthur turns to go back into the warehouse, making everyone suspect that he’s the killer in the vision. Nope. It’s Wally that lowers the beds into the milkbath to drown Blomfeld and his goons. On the one hand, I can understand Wally’s logic in this very specific fictional situation. On the other, NOOOOO Wally!
So that was Minority Report. Was it a worthy follow-up to the film? Initially, not so much. Toward the end, though, I did see some of the potential peeking through. We’ll likely have to wait until spring for an official answer on the show’s fate. In the meantime, enjoy the promo for the deliciously irreverent Lucifer, which will be taking over the Monday 9pm slot on Fox come January.